Let’s talk about change and why growth can feel so difficult. When you’re trying to build a life for yourself – or build a new and better one – it can feel as though you have few options and even fewer that actually work. This is especially true when it feels like all of the…
Advice
How To Stay Positive (Even When Everything Is Awful)
One of the keys to any sort of self-improvement, emotional resilience, even just making progress in your own development is also one of the least appreciated: knowing how to perservere, even when the world seems to be falling apart. In fairness, trying to stay positive and how to keep your head up, even when it…
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Can I Still Find A Relationship When I’m HIV+?
Dear Dr. NerdLove: I don’t know how much you know about gay relationships, but I’m ready to give up and declare myself a “confirmed bachelor,” a quaint term that I might just reinvigorate. I’m 43 and ethnically East Indian. Also I’m HIV positive and undetectable. That means I take regular meds that reduces the virus…
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How to Be Someone People Love To Talk To
We talk a lot about the importance of developing your social skills. However, one of the mistakes I see people make over and over again is how often they focus on the flashier skills; the ones that seem bigger or more impressive. People will, for example, get hung up on all the possible ways of approaching someone at…
The Surprising Secret to Getting Dates on Dating Apps
As someone who’s been active on the Internet since 1994 — before there was a World Wide Web, even — I’ve seen a lot of changes over time. Few, however, have been as significant as the way that online dating has changed. I have seen things you wouldn’t believe. Spring Street Personals, shared across Salon and…
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Why It’s So Difficult To Make Positive Changes
Well, today was going to be a return to some practical topics. I’d been working on a column about approaching people and being able to talk to strangers. I had all my notes wrapped up, I had the rough outline ready to go… and then, well, you know how to make the gods laugh, right?…
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