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Insert Tab A Into Lot B. Repeat As Needed.
Once again: slow your roll, son. Just because the moment’s upon you doesn’t mean that you should rush straight for penetration. You’re only getting this moment once, so you should take your time and enjoy it. That means foreplay, foreplay, foreplay. Make out, let hands and mouths roam over everything not just a bee-line to the nipples or to oral. Savor every inch and sensation and just let the moment build. Check your ego at the door; the sooner you learn to ask what she likes and how she likes it, the better you will do now and in the future. A willingness to take direction cheerfully and a can-do attitude will not only make up for inexperience but help ensure a repeat performance… and possibly even a recommendation to others.
Actual penetration isn’t going to be as easy as movies would convince you it would be; without a guiding hand or two, you can expect a few false starts as you’re trying to fit everything together. Don’t be afraid to ask for a little help; her help will make everything go smoother than just stabbing randomly and hoping to hit the bullseye.
Don’t stress the act itself. You’re a novice at this – nobody is going to be expecting a John Holmes-esque performance of multiple positions and a string of screaming orgasms prior to you finishing. Don’t stress about trying multiple positions or finding the perfect rhythm; slow and steady will serve you perfectly well until you have a little more experience under your belt… as it were. If she’s more experienced than you, then she may have some suggestions for you. Try them, you may find that you like the results and you’ll have some ideas for next time.
And remember: as long as you’re both laughing and having fun, you can’t do anything wrong. Any awkwardness or fumbling is going to pass and you’ll laugh about them afterwards.
Handle The Aftermath Before The Afterglow
Congratulations! You’ve done the deed! You’ve popped your cherry! You’ve traded in your v-card, you’ve become a man, etc. etc. But just because you blew your load doesn’t mean that you’re done.
First things first: you need to withdraw, carefully. You don’t need to pull out as soon as you get off, but you don’t want to linger; you’re going to deflate, which increases the odds of both slippage and spillage. Grab the base of the condom and hold on as you pull out. The last thing you want now is for the condom to slip off. Dispose of it properly; this means it goes in the trash, not flushed down the toilet. A clogged john isn’t anyone’s idea of the capper to a perfect evening.
You’re also going to want to manage the clean-up… so hopefully you have those towels close at hand. A warm wash-cloth probably wouldn’t be unwelcome either, if you have easy access to them.
Now that the deed is done, it’s time to take a few minutes and just let it sink in; it may not have been exactly as you always thought it would have gone, but it was pretty damned amazing, wasn’t it?
Post-Sex Etiquette OR How To Make Sure Your First Time Means There Will Be A Second Time.
A general rule of thumb is to stay the night afterwards. Obviously, this is going to depend on your circumstances; spending the night together isn’t an option if you’ve got 30 minutes before your folks come home or you’ve snuck off during a party. But if you have the option, you should take it; after all, it means there’s more sex in store in the morning, and who doesn’t want that?
Regardless of whether you spend the entire night together or if you have to sneak back home, you owe – at the bare minimum – an extremely grateful phone call the next day before you run out and collect high-fives from all of your buddies… and that’s if you can’t manage to get together in person. Whether your first time was with your girlfriend, a willing female friend or a last-minute hook-up, you’ve shared an amazing experience1 and you should acknowledge this. Don’t fear any post-sexual weirdness or awkwardness; how “weird” it will be afterwards is entirely up to the two of you and how you handle it. If you act like you’ve done something shameful, then of course there will be weirdness. The deed was done and it was awesome and if you act normal, it will be normal.
Remember: don’t be an asshole afterwards; you may be wanting to run out and brag to your friends, but she was involved just as much as you were. Be a gentleman. After all, how you handle things afterwards will determine whether there will be a second time… or even a third.
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