Got a twofer for you today, folks. Let’s get this started.
Hey I have a love related problem (no shit). Sometime in September last year I decided that it’s about time to get a girlfriend and I did what any illogical 15-year old would do: walked up to a girl randomly, asked her out, told my name and number and walked away. That same night she sent me a text with her skype name and we started talking. About a week later we went on our first date. Everything went well. The fact that I want to draw comics and read them didn’t scare her off, it even worked in my advantage and very fast I developed feelings for her.
PROBLEM: She has practically no free time. We almost never get to meet in person and are glorified pienpals. A short while back I understood that It was time to end whatever the hell it was (I can’t call it a relationship) but she asked to meet and talk. We met, saw a movie but then she had to run home for some reason. Sadly seeing her made my feelings for her stronger. She has gone to a different country for a week and after that she has said that she won’t have that much free time either. What should I do? (I am pretty sure you’ll say break up and I am inclined to follow if that’s gonna be your advice.)
First of all, congratulations on maning up and asking her out. At 15, that can be a surprisingly difficult thing to do. Hell, I know people in their 30s who still can’t. Otherwise I wouldn’t be giving nerds love advice…
Anyway,first the good news: don’t worry, I’m not going to tell you to break up with her.
The bad news: This is because you’re not really dating.
I hate to say it, but you called it when you said that you’re glorified pen-pals. You text, e-mail… but not much else. It’s like you’re in a long-distance relationship, but in the same city. The fact of the matter remains that you’re far more invested in this than she is; crazy-ass schedule or not, if she were determined, she could almost certainly make time for you. Keep her as a friend, but you need to realize if you want a girlfriend, it should be someone you can actually see more than once a blue moon.