Acceptable Geekiness Archives - Paging Dr. NerdLove

Olivia Munn and The Threat of the Fake Geeks

March 16, 2016 by Dr. NerdLove 497 Comments

On Saturday, Cliff Bleszinski, creator of games such as Gears of War, went off on a rant about actress Olivia Munn. Among his complaints, he leveled the charge that Olivia Munn is a fake geek girl who is engaging in cultural appropriation of nerd culture.

Folks, Olivia Munn is a bad person. She is the embodiment of appropriating nerd culture and using it for her gain. Don’t trust her.

— Cliff Bleszinski (@therealcliffyb) March 12, 2016

My immediate thoughts on the subject can only be summed up in meme form:

It’s hard exactly to sum up just how Olivia Munn is appropriating nerd culture, seeing as CliffyB didn’t bother actually going into detail other than to rant about her being an asshole and making the usual “your anger only makes me stronger” posts that people seem to think proves that they’re not bothered by the response.

Fuck you and your dumb college catchphrase. Xo https://t.co/mXuT4ThRqw

— Cliff Bleszinski (@therealcliffyb) March 13, 2016

But while there’s a certain amount of irony in CliffyB calling people hipsters for using phrases like “gatekeeping” while slinging terms like “cultural appropriation”, it’s a charge that gets thrown around regularly without irony (usually by people who think using “SJW language” is a magic spell) at women who have the temerity to claim to be geeks or to like geeky properties.

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Gaming While Female

February 22, 2013 by Dr. NerdLove 537 Comments

If you’re a regular reader of my column, you’ll have noticed that interspersed amongst the dating tips, I take the occasional moment to deal with issues that arrise in the geek community… after all, if you’re going to be knee-deep in nerd, it’s good to take a look around and assess how things stand. Unfortunately, geek culture has a woman problem.

For all the progress that we like to believe we’ve made, geekdom still has a schizoid relationship with women. On the one hand, most geeks would agree that a greater female involvement in the geek community is inherently a good thing… but on the other, geeks seem to be damned determine to make a community – whose population is practically defined by being bullied and ostracized – as unwelcoming to women as possible. Women are welcome in the geek community – but only in a specific role. Be attractive – but not too attractive, it makes the geekboys suspicious. Be prepared to justify your geekiness, because if you don’t reach a specific level of knowledge or experience, you are clearly not a real geek. Acknowledge that you are of a lesser standing than guys and that considerations for you as a member of the audience is secondary to men; geek hobbies are, after all “guy things”. Don’t presume to point out that that the portrayal of women in comics and games might be a little sexist, nor should you dare presume to discuss the subject authoritatively or seek to change the status quo.

And most of all… don’t commit the ultimate sin of gaming online while a woman.

Whenever the topic of harassment comes up in gaming culture, it’s almost immediately dismissed as “not a problem”. After all – so goes the legend – the online gaming world is a meritocracy; your level of respect from your fellow players is directly correlated to your skill level. Yes, there’s a lot of smack-talking and people running their mouths, but when you’re choosing to stand in the middle of the monkey cage, you have no right to complain when shit gets hurled at you.

"Bring it you little spawn-camping bitch, I'm going to ram that Dragunov right up your fucking ASS!" — “Bring it you little spawn-camping bitch, first I’m going to rip your face off, then I’m going to cover you with my poop, and then I’m going to ram that Dragunov right up your fucking ASS!”

Doesn’t matter who you are, man or woman, everybody gets treated the same. If women can’t hack it the way dudes can, well maybe they shouldn’t be taking part, right bro? Right. Brofist.

Yeah. Not so much.

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Ask Dr. NerdLove: Let ‘Em Down Easy

August 29, 2012 by Dr. NerdLove 24 Comments

Dr Nerdlove,

I know this blog is mostly geared towards geeky guys, but I’m a geek girl with a problem. I’m super attracted to geeks, mostly because of the whole similar interests thing. As you have said sometimes geeks are shy, I’m pretty shy too, but I’ve finally gotten to the point where I am more comfortable asking people out. I was told (by an ex) that relationships never work out when a girl makes the first move, it sounds ridiculous in my head, but could he be right? Obviously I haven’t had a relationship work out (or I likely wouldn’t be looking for a new one) but I haven’t had someone I’ve asked out work out at all. Am I doing something wrong? Should I still stay shy?

Shrinking Violet

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On “Fake” Geek Girls

July 26, 2012 by Dr. NerdLove 159 Comments

There’s been some grousing for a while about “fake” geek girls, girls who – gasp!, shock! – pretend to be geeks in order to get attention! As geek culture has been growing in influence and cultural significance, more people have taken notice of us. This, in turn means that more people are willing to market to geeks… and others are perfectly willing to pander towards them or even exploit them.

The latest go-round of pearl-clutching, beard stroking and deep-seated harumphing was kicked off when Joe Peacock – self-appointed gatekeeper of all things geek – took up arms against this supposed pox upon the community with an article on CNN.com entitled Booth Babes Need Not Apply, complaining that San Diego Comic-Con- amongst other offenders – was “populated with “hot chicks” wearing skimpy outfits simply to get a bunch of gawking geeks’ heads to turn, just to satisfy their hollow egos.”

Now while I’m willing to believe that Peacock’s heart is in the right place, the execution leaves a lot to be desired. In an attempt to comment about “Booth Babes” and “poachers” in geekdom, he manages to dip both feet in a frothy mix of nerdrage. sexism, slut-shaming and epic fail and jam ’em rather firmly in his mouth.

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Talkin’ Nerdy: Talking About Your Geeky Interests

June 29, 2012 by Dr. NerdLove 69 Comments

I’ve talked a bit about how nerds have an unfortunate tendency to buy into the self-limiting belief that being a nerd is somehow a hinderance to dating.

It’s always struck me as a little odd; generally we like to say that we’re proud to be geeks, but when it comes to talking about the things we’re into… well, geeks tend to get a little on the defensive side. Don’t believe me? Ask a Bronie about his favorite TV show.

Then stand back. They get a little vehement sometimes.

Searching for "Angry Brony" with safe-search off lead to some... interesting... discoveries. — Can’t imagine why…

You can repeat the process with Browncoats, otaku, even table-top gamers – scratch a nerd and you’ll find somebody who’s used to being given a ration of shit for what she or he is into.

It can be hard to want to dip a toe into the dating pool when you’re worried about when the getting-to-know-you conversation will inevitably turn to “So, what are you into?” It can be difficult to meet new people when you feel as though you have to justify your interests every single time you meet someone new.

Small wonder some geeky guys get fetishize geek girls. Why worry about the possibility of being mocked for what you like when you can just stick to your own kind?

But what if it didn’t have to be that way?

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