Every once in a while, a topic will just drop into my lap because The Discourse becomes inescapable. And this time, the topic of value and what it means to be (or attract) a “high value” man has been popping up everywhere. TikTok – and Twitter accounts talking about TikTok – has been an absolute clearing house of folks talking about “high value men”. Whether it’s been dating advice and pick-up podcasts posting their lowlights for engagement, to would-be tradwifes bragging about how they snagged a “high value” man, it seems like you can’t swing the metaphorical dead cat without hitting at least three or four discussions or proclamations about “value”.
Now, normally I would roll my eyes and move to something less obnoxious. However, part of what stands out to me isn’t just how the concept infects the dating scene, but how people are getting it wrong. In a fit of irony sufficient to make Alanis Morrisette blush… these discussions are actually providing no value.
So let’s talk about what it really means to be a high-value man… and why so many people get it wrong.