Dear Dr. NerdLove
My ex and I broke up at the beginning of the year. It was something that tore both of us apart, to the point of her blocking me on all social media accounts. We tried a long distance relationship and at first it was good. We managed to see each other 4 times in the span of last year so her suddenly dropping off the map hurt like hell.
She still contacts friends of mine telling them how she wants to come visit and see them. It makes me feel invisible and unwanted at times when they tell me.
One night a couple of weeks ago, I decided to call her but she sent me to voicemail. I decided that I would send her an email telling her how I often felt like getting on a plane and going to see her so we could talk. Not in an attempt to get back together, but just get that face to face conversation we never had (the break up was over a video call) but I know she wasn’t the kind of girl to take an unannounced visit as a good thing.
Recently, I was talking to a mutual friend who told me that she was terrified of the fact that I would show up. Hearing this hurt me in a way I never expected. The last thing I ever wanted my ex to think about me is that I’m some crazy psycho.
I can’t get in contact with her and obviously I can’t explain myself to her. I’m a bit of a loss about what to do.
Not So Scary