Hey Dr. Nerdlove-
So a female in college, and have been dating “D” for a year now; our first anniversary was actually on Sunday. He’s a pretty cool guy, and we obviously get along pretty well, but there is a definite problem in our sex life. I’m basically always horny, but three times out of four he says he’s too tired. I’m sure you can see how frustrating that is. I’m lucky to get it once a week. He watches porn and beats off almost every day, which I always took as indicative of a high sex drive, but now I’m not so sure. Is it wrong of me to want sex more often if he doesn’t feel like giving it? It sounds petty, but I didn’t even get it on our anniversary.
I’ve never orgasmed with him, because when we do have sex he freaks out at he idea of touching or even looking at my vagina. Any time we do have sex, it’s in the hopes of orgasming vaginally, which I know is kind of a stretch. I like giving him pleasure, but he doesn’t seem to want to reciprocate beyond playing with my boobs.
I really don’t know what to do. The thought of breaking up with him is scary because he’s been such a huge part of my life, but I can’t seem to get through to him how frustrated I am. Your advice would be so much appreciated.