Every relationship has what’s known as “The Honeymoon Period”. During this point in time, everything is amazing. The world beams at you with benificence. . Every morning cartoon birds fly in through your window to make you breakfast while fat happy mice serenade the two of you. Life is a grand adventure with you and your partner who is such a Perfect Being that he or she farts rainbows and candyfloss.
She doesn’t have flaws, she has idiosyncrasies. His snoring and propensity to get distracted by whatever shiny object flits within his field of vision isn’t annoying, it’s adorable. And every single person in this stage of the relationship will inevitably say those same three words:
“We never fight.”
You might as well say “I’ll be right back” or “What else could go wrong?”, for as we all know, the Universe is powered by irony and saying “We never fight” is more or less the karmic equivalent of climbing a mountain top and shouting “GOD HAS SHITTY AIM!” at the top of your lungs.
Inevitably the happy new relationship fog fades and reality rears it’s ugly head and those little cute quirks aren’t cute anymore and you have The Fight, and suddenly the happy couple is questioning whether they were even supposed to be together in the first place.
Arguments and fights are an inevitable part of relationships. Fighting isn’t a sign that things are wrong, nor is not fighting an indication that your relationship is perfect. However, if you don’t know how to argue properly, you do risk doing damage to the relationship… or worse, being cut off from sex for who knows how long.
If you’re going to fight, you have to know how to argue correctly. This ain’t ‘Nam, Smokey, there’re rules. To arguing. ((Just to forestall the inevitable comment thread, we’ve all seen that Monty Python sketch thank you very much.))