So last time we talked about one of the eternal questions: why aren’t women more receptive to casual sex? The common answer is that women approach sex differently than men do – whether it’s treating sex as a way of getting a relationship, leveraging their “superior” social status in order to screen out less-desirable males or just guarding their finite, precious eggs for someone with superior genes rather than the usual pigs that approach her.
As it turns out though, according to sociological studies the answer is “well… it’s complicated”.
A whole host of issues influence how receptive individual women are to casual sex: societal messages regarding female sexuality and gender roles, potential physical safety and – perhaps most importantly – whether or not the man in question is going to be worth getting in the sack. After all, a number of women – nearly half – report having negative feelings the morning after a one-night stand; they said they felt “used” or worried for their reputation. In other words: the morning after wasn’t worth the night before.
And yet women do want sexual pleasure without pesky relationship strings, just as men do.
In an ideal world, this would not be as much of an issue; women would be lauded and encouraged to take ownership of their sexuality just as men are, comprehensive sex education would begin early, contraception would be cheap and plentiful and rape culture would not exist. In such an environment, men and women both would be free to explore and express their sexuality without fear of shame or judgement.
Unfortunately, that’s not the world we live in, and so we must adapt.
For men who are interested in more casual sex, whether it’s a short term fling or taking someone home the same night you meet her, you need to know just how to be worth it – to be someone women feel safe with, that they feel attracted towards, who know how to please a woman in bed and how to stick the landing the morning after so that it’s not a night of regrets for one or both of you.