I am utterly in love with the geek of my dreams. It’s the kind of romance I’ve always dreamed of. We met on a dating website and within five minutes of meeting in person we were chatting as though we had known each other for years. We are equally happy going out to dinner or spending a night in playing video games. We both fell hard and fast and have recently started to look at engagement rings. He is extremely socially awkward and I have a temper, I’m an extrovert and he’s an introvert so the two of us have our share of arguments, but we always manage to work it out. It’s not a perfect relationship, but I tend to describe us as perfect for each other since we balance each other’s flaws exactly as we both need. All in all I’ve never been happier with a partner.
I’m giving all this background because with how excellent things are, I am currently feeling like the worst person in the world. I have a crush on someone that I have only ever met online.
This other person is very different from my boyfriend. Self employed musician and indie comic book publisher. He’s smart and funny and we have engaged in some very light flirting via FB posts. I’ve never seriously hit on him, in fact I’ve flirted harder with my male friends in front of my boyfriend (he’s very secure in the fact that I love him and just happen to have a flirty personality), but the fact that there is this mildly sexual edge made me feel like a douchebag after it happened. I almost feel like it’s safe to flirt with him because we’ve never met in person, but since he is a musician he has invited me to several of his gigs. I think he might not even be aware of my crush since he says when are you and your man coming to see me play? Even if I brought my boyfriend with me I feel like actually meeting this guy in person would be a form of betrayal.
I have no intention of ever cheating on my boyfriend. I love him and am absolutely committed to starting our life together. So why do I have a crush on this other guy? And more importantly how do I make it go away?
The Worst Girlfriend Ever