Trying to meet amazing women can be incredibly intimidating, even terrifying. There’s an understandable fear of judgement or rejection, especially since meeting women requires deliberately making yourself vulnerable to a relative stranger. There’s also the understandable worry of what your social success says about you and your worth as a person.
However, so much of why it can be so intimidating is because we put unrealistic expectations on ourselves. We feel as though that we need to be “perfect” in order to get people’s interest, and in order to do that we need to know exactly what we’re doing. And we often don’t.
In fact, it’s that sense of not having an explicit road map or set of instructions that leaves them feeling terrified when they even think about trying to meet women. And to be sure: much of this fear comes from trying to avoid the hard stuff – being willing to be vulnerable, being willing to risk rejection and or even humiliation. This is precisely why so many people want scripts and one-size-fits-all rule sets to follow. If you have rules, then success is supposed to be assured… theoretically.
The problem with this outlook is that humans aren’t meat robots that follow algorithms and relationships don’t follow the if/then patterns that scripted routines and “secret seduction technique$” claim. There’s no escaping the inherent messiness of the human condition; accepting that risk is part and parcel of the whole adventure.
But imagine how much easier it would be to date if you weren’t having to fight through the fear first.
Meeting and dating women isn’t about being perfect or knowing exactly how to act at every second of the interaction. Being an incredible catch, the kind of guy that women would be lucky to date, isn’t about technique, it’s about your mindset. When you’re hung up on the outcome, rather than just connecting, you create barriers between yourself and the very people you want to match with. When you have the right outlook and approach to dating and meeting people, you remove the fear and anxiety and let your best and most authentic self shine.
Here’s how to change the way you think about dating and unlock your inner dating Jedi.