Dear Dr. NerdLove:
I am a 35 year old cis gendered male (He/Him/His) and I live in Chicago. 5 years ago I saw a live taping of a podcast that has since become a favorite of mine. At that taping I immediately had a crush on the co host. Like, I was just watching her smile and laughing when she laughed, all while having no idea what she was saying. I would smile at her smiling. So, crushing pretty hard (Lydia Loveless lyrics that fit the bill: ‘European’ “I just want to watch your lips move till I don’t know what the words mean…”)
Sadly, at that time I was in a deep depression and was too chicken shit to take an opportunity to flirt with her after the taping. Now, 5 years later and I still have a crush on her. It is not as intense as before but I am still finding her incredibly attractive, not just looks (but damn she fine like a ticket on the dash) but her sense of humor, how she laughs, her nerdiness, and how she carries herself. I mean, she mad good at being funny and charming on twitter I dig her, she cool. Aaaannddd, after having an opportunity to talk with her after she was interviewing a famous person at a local event, I was again chicken shit and bailed…
So, my quandary is that I don’t know what to do with this? Just leave it as “oh, it’s fun to have a crush, now move on dear boy” or maybe I am just not enough of a romantic, and I should go for it? I hear stories of other people that see someone and are floored by them and then they meet and date and marry… but I can’t imagine that happening to me. Either to chickenshit-ness or me not being a romantic. If I try to find ways to be around her more or to communicate with her over social media I am worried about being a creeper. (I am now much too scared of ‘sliding into dm’s’)
So, when is a crush worth pursuing and when is it a harmless flight of fancy? If it is worth pursuing, how to go about it? Is it weird to try and find ways to be around her? She has a podcast and they have frequent live tapings and she frequently is used as a host for interviewing fun and interesting guest at various functions around the city. So the opportunities exist…
Help me Dr NerdLove, you’re my only hope…
Languishing Excitement In Another
