Dear Dr. NerdLove:

Four weeks ago I matched with girl on Tinder, and things went normally. I broke the ice with a few questions, gave her my number so we could text instead (I didn’t call her since we had already been previously texting on tinder) and then made plans for a date. A couple days after that, I met her out for drinks and pool and darts (at this point we were having good conversation but no physical escalation ). We tried to go somewhere to dance but since it was the middle of the week, the place was dead; we just hung out and  talked instead. At this point we held hands as we left. Next we  drove to a karaoke bar, sang some songs and kissed. When we were leaving, I suggested we go to her place which was a block away. She agreed. We talked a bit, then started making out and things escalated. I was not planning on having sex which her, and I had even said this earlier, because I like to have sex with people I really care about. However, I felt comfortable with her so we had sex after all. I’m pretty sure it was good for her, she was a bit dry, so she was sore after but she was satisfied at least physically. The next morning, we messed around more but didn’t have sex because she was sore. Then we slept again till noon, which was a little late for us. We ended up talking for another two hours before I left to eat.

I waited four days and then had this texting exchange:

Me: Hey [DATE], hope your weekend has been going well. I had a great time with you last week and I’d love to see you again. What’s your schedule look like this week?
Her: It was really great meeting you, but I’m going to politely decline that second date. Hope all the best for you!
Me: That’s a real shame, I really enjoyed spending time with you. If you change your mind, feel free to hit me up. Hope all the best for you too.

I now have no clue what went wrong. Neither of us talked about seeing each other again. She asked in the morning how the date went and I sarcastically and playfully said “definitely a 2”.  I did make stupid comment about how much I could bench (witch is only 200) that may have come off cocky, I asked if she liked some of my favorite things and could have been to check-box-y. I also was too confident about knowing she would have me over. I don’t know if I was distant or relationship-y or she just didn’t have that spark, but even as I left, we were kissing and things seems good so I don’t know what went wrong.

Let me know what you think and what I should do.

First Time Unlucky

[Read more…]