Hi Doc, I’m hoping you can help.
Recently my brother and I got into an argument. I was talking about the new Zack Snyder’s Netflix film Army of the Dead and my brother mentioned he did not like said director. When I asked why he brought up that the YouTube channel Geeks and Gamers had done a stream where Zack had denounced them as “nazis” — those were my brothers words.
I stated as long as they had nothing to do with GamerGate then fair enough, whereupon my brother stated all the fallacies involved with it, basically blaming the women who got threatened and doxxed. I was trying to just avoid an argument when he then mentioned he did not like the term “incel” as that was what some of the people in GamerGate were being called.
The thing is that my brother is basically one.
To go back a ways, he has always not had any friends, even when he was young. In fact, after leaving school, I can’t think of a time he spent time with other people, and he’s had barely any female company. We live in the UK, and since he doesn’t work, he’s drawing benefits. He spends all day on his laptop watching YouTube videos. Has always been socially awkward, given that he is on the autism spectrum and he can’t regulate his emotions.
He was what I’d call a social hand grenade; I’ve had him come out with me and my friends a few times, and it ended up him throwing a tantrum over something, making me look bad then having to get him out of the situation.
It doesn’t end there as any conversation I have with him — usually films or tv programs — ends up with him saying he doesn’t like the people involved with said films or tv shows due to their ” liberal lefty” politics. Now I just try not to talk to him anymore, which is a problem as, due to the pandemic, he lives with me .
I know it sounds awful, but he is my brother and I love him… though I am getting to the end of my tether with him. How do I talk to him or change his mind? I’d just like to look on life more positively.
A Brother at the End of His Tether