So, we’ve been talking about fashion a bit here, and perhaps you’re starting to think to yourself that it’s time to update the ol’ wardrobe. Time to start tossing everything to Goodwill and start over fresh, right?
And just like that… well, I’m afraid you’ve made your first mistake, my friend.
At the risk of sounding like the set up to a bad stand-up routine… you’re shopping like a guy. And to be perfectly frank when it doesn’t come to things that aren’t typical nerd guy interests (comics, books, games) guys have this tendency to be… well, not the most efficient of shoppers. We tend to have two settings; either we have absolutely no idea what we’re looking for and tend to stand around looking like a socially awkward puppy and grabbing things in a state of minor panic or we go into full Terminator mode, looking for one thing and one thing only.
As a result, you either end up with a closet full of stuff you don’t really like or you end up with guys wearing the same clothes they’ve owned for the last 10 years; neither of which works terribly well when you’re trying to upgrade your style.
So it’s time to quit shopping like a dude.
Start shopping like a girl.
Let’s dispense with the obvious right away. I’m not talking about acting out a montage out from Pretty Woman, leaving the store overloaded with bags and a trail of sales clerks with dollar signs dancing in their eyes. You want to be more efficient with your time and your money and end up with clothes that you actually want, ones that you’ll actually wear out more than once before it takes up permanent residence at the back of your closet, never to see the light of day again.
Oh sure, it’s fun to tease the image of needing to bring another guy along to act as your pack-mule as you pillage stores like a fashion-mad Viking who knows there’s a massive sale on horned helmets on at Lindisfarne (Google it kids) but that’s not going to get you anywhere in the end. You need to learn the techniques. The skills. Skills like…
Learn To Find The Bargains.
The axiom “You get what you pay for” is especially true for clothing. High quality, stylish clothes are going to cost you, and this initial outlay can be intimidating, especially when you’re used to more modest prices. However, this doesn’t mean that higher-end clothes are necessarily out of reach… it just means you need to learn how to get what you want for less. So you need to change your shopping strategies. To start with, learn when the sales are. Those jeans you like at Nordstrom or Diesel may be way more than you’re willing to pay at first, but when they’re 20, 30 or 40% off, you might find it well within your price range.
Don’t forget to look online. I’m a big fan of going to the store, finding clothes I want, then buying them online where the prices are cheaper. Yes, you do lose the immediacy of having it right then when you purchase it and you don’t have the advantage of trying the clothes on in the store. But the savings can be worth it, especially if you already know how those particular brands fit you.
Some stores, such as Zappos will be regularly be more affordable than anything you find in stores. There are many online stores such as eModa, LIFEandDEATH and Solis that hold weekly sales on select brands. Then there are membership-only stores such as Gilt that have daily sales on designer labels; it can still be pricey, but the discounts are impressive. You do need to be fast on the draw however, since there are limited numbers.
For that matter, don’t neglect less obvious venues such as eBay and Amazon. Yes. Amazon. I’ve found shirts that retail for $50 in stores for $25-$30, with free 2nd day shipping to boot.
A word of caution: when you’re looking for deals on clothing, you may immediately think of outlet malls. You need to do some research when you’re going outlet shopping. Many of the larger retailers have outlet-only lines with lower quality materials and shoddy construction; you’re basically buying a store-sponsored knock-off of it’s own products. Make sure you know how much the clothes cost in the real store and learn to tell the difference in the apparel tags; the outlet knock-offs will be different from the tags you’ll find in the stores.
Shop Strategically
Once you’ve decided to change your look, it can be tempting to go hog wild and buy an entirely new wardrobe. You need to hold back. Think of fashion as though it were a new relationship; when you’re starting out it’s easy to get caught up in the flood of emotions and excitement. If you aren’t careful, you can find yourself neck-deep in promises you didn’t think through fully and commitments that seemed like a great idea at the time but leave a lot to be desired when you look at them in the cold light of day.
This is how you end up with a dozen Salvage tees that you thought were awesome at first but don’t really match anything else you own and you don’t really like wearing them anymore because you’re getting turned away from clubs for looking too “Affliction-y” and….
er… Where was I? Oh, right, relationships.
The point I was aiming for is that like a new relationship, don’t want to rush into things. You have to take your time and learn to feel things out.
So while you’re updating your wardrobe you need to pace yourself. Don’t dive in head first and buy bundles that you’ll come to regret later. At the same time, you don’t want to let yourself stagnate; you will find that your style evolves over time and some items that you were wearing two or three years ago don’t work as well as they used to.
A good rule of thumb is what I refer to as the “Paycheck rule”. When you’re updating your wardrobe, you pace yourself by your paycheck. Every two weeks (on average, anyway) when you receive your paycheck, you buy one piece of clothing. As a result you have a nice, fairly regular churn to your wardrobe; you’re adding new clothes at a controlled rate that gives you more time to consider your style and keeping your style fresh.
Shop Hollistically
When you’re shopping, it’s too easy to focus only on the items you’re looking at in the store: how does it look at this very moment, in combination with the clothes you’re wearing right then? And this is all well and good… if you’re only ever going to wear it with those exact same clothes for the rest of time. When you’re looking at new clothes, you need to keep the clothes you already own in mind. How will this jacket look when it’s paired with your favorite pair of jeans? Will that shirt work as well with shorts as it does with slacks? Is this a piece with some versatility, or is it a very specific look that will only work as part of a very specific outfit?
This is not to say that every article of clothing you buy has to go with everything; there’s a lot to be said for having single purpose outfits. It’s the difference between generalization and specialization; a generalist can do many things reasonably well, but a specialist can do one thing amazingly.
And if that shirt you’re looking at is a single-outfit shirt… well, you should ask yourself whether you think you have the style and the balls to be a little daring and try wearing it out of context . Fashion is about knowing the rules.
Style is about knowing when to break the rules.
Shop in the Afternoon
Your body is in a constant state of flux. Your measurements will be changing subtly over the course of a day; you’ll be at your thinnest and lightest immediately after waking up in the morning. After all, not only have you not eaten in six to eight hours, but you will also be somewhat dehydrated. You’ll have just spent the last several hours resting, with minimal muscle movements. By mid-afternoon, you will have been moving around for the majority of the day. You will have eaten two meals – possibly some snacks or beverages as well. Your feet will have swollen slightly from walking. Your gut will be distended as you digest your meal. If you have spent some time at the gym, blood will still be flowing to your muscles, leaving them engorged.
This is the perfect time to go clothes shopping.
Wait, wha…?
Y’see, because your body changes it’s measurements subtly over the course of the day, the way your clothes fit will change as well. If you’re buying clothes in the morning, they’re going to be significantly tighter, especially around your waist by the end of the day. Buying them in the afternoon will give you a better sense of their “true” fit.
Plus, having a little extra room in the waistband in the morning? It kinda feels awesome.
Abuse The Return Policy
No matter where you shop, every clothing store you ever visit will have this in common: you will look your absolute worst in the dressing room. I don’t care if you’re an Australian underwear model with a body like a Greek god and cheekbones that could slice cheese, overhead florescent lighting is nobody’s friend. Your skin will look washed out while all your imperfections pop, you will have deep shadows under your eyes, the colors will clash and the mirror will either make you look fatter than you are or skinnier than you are. The dressing room is there to let you check the fit and then determine just how badly you want those clothes.
So the best thing you can do is take ’em home with you and check them out under real-world situations. Trying them on at home, with normal lights, your own clothes and a mirror whose biases you can account for will give you a truer representation of how the clothes really look on you.
In fact, if the store’s policy is lenient (**KoffKoffNordstromKoffKoff**) enough… well, you may just want to take ’em on a quick test drive1. Just make sure that you can return them looking as though they’re unworn.
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